Sloth

Wise men conferred with the almighty God
In one way or another
Burning Bush, flaming words upon the wall, visions galore
In one way or another
Wise men conferred with the almighty God
And leaned the path to damnation and called them Sins
Some are fun
Some are dangerous
And some are just plain stupid
Sloth: Laziness, inactivity, etc.
They must have been grasping at straws after they came up with the first six deadly sins
For them to resort to decreeing that doing nothing was evil
It’s not evil! It’s just… lazy. Inert.
An object at rest tends to stay at rest. Does that mean that object is going to hell?
Idle hands are the Devil’s workshop
Well, yeah, but once you start doing the devil’s deeds you’re not guilty of sloth,
You’re up and about actually doing something
Go out, burn down a few things that don’t belong to you, spout blasphemy, and get some fresh air and exercise doing it! Fiends!!
Sloth is just too copasetic to be evil. Laid back, relaxed, possibly high or inebriated,
But they’re not hurting anybody!
Again, this is one of those situations where moderation is the defining line between Taking a well-deserved break
And earning a one-way ticket to eternal damnation.
Most of the other deadly sins have some entertainment value,
But Sloth is just dullsville

Having spent some time wallowing in my own misery
I found myself with the desire to do absolutely nothing
And didn’t really enjoy it, to be honest
It’s the bargain bin sin
You’re still going straight to the furnace
But you don’t have to do anything to get there! Act now! Or rather, don’t!
I suppose I can see how it could be detrimental
If one were in the position to, say, pluck kittens from a burning building and decided “Nah”
Or some other comparable rescue situation, but other than that it doesn’t seem to be such a big deal
I for one sympathize with the Two-Toed Sloth
It’s not his fault he got named after a deadly sin. And why?
Because he’s a little slow on the uptake and enjoys hanging upside down for years at a time. What’s wrong with that?
We don’t call turtles, such equally slow creatures,
Harsh names like the hard-shelled lazy bastard, do we? I don’t.
I for one have better things to do with my time than nothing.
Almost anything would be better than doing nothing at all
But I still don’t think it rates pretty high on the you’re-going-to-hell-ometer.
Then again, I didn’t write the Bible.
I’m just a scribe with a keyboard and obviously too much time on his hands.
What’s your excuse?