The Cupcake Defense

I should have known mentioning the Cupcake defense was going to spark something. And I definitely should have seen it coming from the lawyer...

Jeff, friend and co-star from Assassins and Urinetown sent me the following exchange.

The Court: Mr. Jones, you have just been found guilty of slaughtering the entire population of the Little Debbie Baking Facility in Muncie, Indiana. What do you have to say for yourself?

Casey: (clears throat) "We just wanted cupcakes."

The Court: I hereby overturn the verdict!

* * *

Now: I can't really see myself running amuck in a pastry factory-- okay, that's a lie. I can easily envision myself running amuck in a pastry factory-- but in light of the absolute massacre involved, blood and creme filling flying everywhere; could one sentence really vindicate a multiple murderer? Even one so prolific as "But we just wanted cupcakes"? (And how's that for a run-on sentence!)

And who would be my accomplice or partner in crime? 'But we just wanted cupcakes.'

Far too many thoughts on an entirely silly concept. 100% nonsense.

Thanks, Jeff. Outstanding.

Happy Birthday, Pedro

Today was a good day. Chris (aka Pedro) deserved nothing less.

His girlfriend Angela smuggled him up here for the day. He thought they were going to Philadelphia. Heh heh. Eeevil.

We went to Union Square, took in a few sights, slipped over to Soho (Dean & Deluca. More on them later.) and then to Times Square. Any day in which you see an animatronic Tyrannosaurus Rex is a good one.

So. On the way back to the apartment, Angela and I slipped away to the Bakery to grab some cupcakes. They were remodeling; and despite the door being unlocked told us they were closed. My jaw gaped just a little bit.

"But... we just wanted cupcakes." They took mercy on us. I pointed out some chocolate cupcakes and said, "Okay, please give us the minimum number of cupcakes for a credit card."

The credit card machine was disconnected. "It's my friend's birthday. How much are cupcakes?" They're $1.75. I had three bucks on me; enough for one. I slapped two bills on the shelf. "One cupcake, please." They asked if we really only wanted one, if it was someone's birthday. I looked to Angela, who shrugged. It wouldn't be much of a party with only one cupcake.

The manager (I'm assuming) told us we could ask for more, and stop by the next day to pay for 'em. I asked for two additional cupcakes, and quickly scribbled on a business card "I owe you for two cupcakes."

So. Now that I've visited an ATM, I can swing by tomorrow to pay for the other two cupcakes. Which, for the record, were delicious.

I do want to say, I've never used the "But we just wanted cupcakes" defense before. It was 100% effective. Perhaps it will have applications in the future...